How To Write a Book About Your Life
Ollie Ander
Is probably just a couple cats in a trench-coat—the hair shedding and sunlight napping are highly suspect.
Everyone has a story to tell. For some, that turns out to be a fiction epic, for others, an introspective on their life thus far. If you’re compelled to share your life story, whether through creative non-fiction or formal autobiography, this article can serve as a prep list, going over where to start and what to keep in mind.
Determine what makes your life interesting to others
Before getting into the outline, you should figure out your book’s "draw:" what’s the appeal of reading your life story? Not everyone believes in writing to market (and the idea of that is evermore inapplicable to personal non-fiction, since you shouldn’t be making anything up) but knowing your draw is vital to how the story will shape, as well as how interested people will be to read it. The appeal of your memoir will significantly change your outlining process, so below I’ve listed how the form should be reflective of the memoir’s draw.
PseudoCelebrity
The most notable nonfiction in mainstream, popular culture are the (auto)biographies of celebrities. People are always interested in hearing how others garnered their fame.
If you are of the (pseudo)celebrity class, it should be easy to discern based on online discourse what people are most interested to hear about: unprecedented success, political gains, even scandals?
Feel free to market toward the masses’ curiosity, but don’t give it to them outright. Flesh your story out with select anecdotes or necessary context, positioning what people want to know most as the climax of your book instead.
Expert
Even if you are not a household name, you may be writing a memoir from a position of having desirable expertise. Do people envy your station in life? Have you learned something through your life experiences worth sharing?
A desirable lifestyle can foster interest in others as to how you managed to achieve that (or thoughts on your position post-fact). If you have authority on a subject, you can pull readers in with the promise of sharing your knowledge, even if that is something as subjective as "how you found true happiness!"
Singularity
Under this type of memoir, there are also those who are "experts" due to an exclusivity: someone who is the only person able to speak on a particular situation or event.
Unlike a celebrity, a memoir written as an expert on a topic will not have the same parasocial appeal. Be concise and don’t dawdle with anecdotes, as you’ll be much more likely to lose reader interest by wasting their time—they want answers, not emotional investments.
Essayist
Where experts will use minimal, singular experiences to communicate their story’s take-away and dissect meaning through a post-mortem, a thesis-based memoir may use the presentation of in-time, creative non-fiction to linger on the mundane with the intention of strengthening a latter point: i.e. constructing a thesis.
You may wish to use your life as a lens with which to deliver information. This is a great way to make completely unfamiliar lived experiences feel relatable rather than boring, or overly factual. When doing this, make sure you stay focused on the thesis: don’t stray too far away into unrelated matters if it doesn’t strengthen the journey or conclusion.
Identity
You don’t need to be someone "successful" to write a memoir—it's a commonality that allows readers to engage with memoirs the easiest. There are plenty of amazing memoirs out there that aren’t much more than an open-book display of humanity. That’s endearing!
If the appeal of your memoir is your identity, absolutely give yourself the spotlight you deserve, but also keep in mind the need for anchor points. To be a gateway for others’ understanding requires a certain amount of awareness as to what needs additional context or explanations— facilitate ease of access as much as possible. Don’t always assume readers will know what something is like before proceeding deeper into the beautiful maze of your unique existence.
How to prepare to write your memoir
As explored above, the execution of your memoir will vary based on its appeal to others, but there are some general starter steps that apply across the board. If you prepare the following elements before diving into writing, the process should go much smoother for you.
Gather Anecdotes
Start by writing everything down—and I mean everything. It’s better to have more than you need then to remember half-way through drafting that there was a forgotten moment capable of completely bringing the themes together (but now you’d have to rewrite everything to include).
Cut the Fluff
Although some memoirs cater to the style of an essayist (drawing meaning out from accumulated mundane moments) there should still always be a point to what’s included. This can even be said for life stories with parasocial appeal, centered on celebrities. As much as readers may be intrigued about Hollywood/influencer relationships, including any that don’t serve in characterization or theme will just come off as bragging about one’s connections.
This is a balancing act. If your story is dependent on readers developing an emotional attachment to a parental figure so they can fully grasp the impact they had in your life, then characterization may require smaller, nuanced, and (at the time) seemingly inconsequential details. Just make sure that in your outline you have a reason for everything included.
Read Other’s Stories
Seek out stories from others that are similar to yours. Read up! Not only will it preemptively connect you with your intended audience’s space, but it could help you navigate your angle of delivery. Is there something you can add to discussions already being had online? Is there a topic you can speak on through your lived experiences that it seems like no one else has done before?
What to consider before publication
Once you’ve finished the first draft of your life story, your focus should be on the efficiency of your delivery. It can be quite hard to achieve an objective view when doing revisions, so you may want to enlist the help of a third-party assistant (be that a friend, hired beta reader, editor, etc). Does the execution of the writing do justice to your life story?
Take a Step Back
It’s hard not to get "too close" to the story—it’s about your life, afterall! As with all creative endeavors though, it’s important to take a step away, leave it alone for a bit, and come back with fresh eyes. Just as fiction writers go blind to plot holes because they’ve been far too entrenched in their world to see what’s been missed, non-fiction writing on oneself can suffer the same pitfall: is there context missing? For example: Would it strengthen decisions you made later in life to know more about where you grew up—or oppositely, did the inclusion of your past bog down the conclusion of your adulthood?
Provide Resources
There’s nothing wrong with speaking to one’s personal experiences, but it may be worthwhile to research relevant resources so you can provide them to readers. It’s important to supply readers with as much value as possible. Even if you are not taking a detached, factual approach to delivering your story (with interwoven citations), it’s always nice to provide a page at the back for additional resources, related reading material, or similar works. Likewise, trigger warnings would be appropriate if you are covering heavy, personal topics.
Consider Legality
Depending on the scope of topics covered in your story, you may need to consider potential complications with legality, and take precautions.
Factual accuracy should always be held to the highest standard in non-fiction, but everyone’s perspective is different. If you wish to include other people, make sure to get express permission to use their name, or alter their name’s inclusion for legal safety. Nobody wants to face defamation charges when simply trying to tell their story as accurately to their experience as possible.
Although every memoir’s content will be as different as the life of those who write them, this article hopefully served as a guiding hand on how to prepare for the task, preferred execution/ the appeal of various types, and considerations before eventual publication.
Unfortunately, as many writers will attest, what’s even harder than organizing your thoughts and writing a whole book? Marketing it. Thankfully, we’ve got you covered on that front too! Here’s an insightful article on $ How to Sell a Memoir When You’re Basically a Nobody$ .
Like what you're reading?
Join other authors like you in NovelPad’s free writing community!
Join the communitySimilar Posts
What File Formats are Accepted by Kindle Direct Publishing?
File types for ebooks, paperbacks, and hardbacks on Amazon's KDP.
Ollie Ander
Is probably just a couple cats in a trench-coat—the hair shedding and sunlight napping are highly suspect.
The Writer’s Resolution Guide 2024
Goal ideas and strategies for your new writing year.
Sage Kay
Writer, reader, outfit repeater.
How long is a fantasy book? Words, pages, chapters, scenes, & prologues
What should wordcount goals look like for a fantasy novel?
S.R. Beaston
Crafty with words, wit, and wisdom, just add caffeine to make it more interesting.
What is a NovelPad Scene Card? | Organizing Your Novel
S.R. Beaston
Crafty with words, wit, and wisdom, just add caffeine to make it more interesting.
Camp NaNo Perks 2023
What are the benefits of participating in Camp NaNoWriMo?
S.R. Beaston
Crafty with words, wit, and wisdom, just add caffeine to make it more interesting.
How To Outline A Story With Mindmaps | Visual Novel Planning
Outline your novel with this visual strategy.
Ollie Ander
Is probably just a couple cats in a trench-coat—the hair shedding and sunlight napping are highly suspect.